


Teenage Dream

by awoogah123



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Angst, Exchange Student, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Germany, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Original Character(s), mention of conversion camp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:07:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27388450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awoogah123/pseuds/awoogah123
Summary: Nicky goes to stay with the Kloses in Germany, not only does he fall in love, he is also saved
Relationships: Nicky Hemmick/Erik Klose
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter 1

Nicky may as well have been asleep, his eyes glazed over and he bore a hole into the textbook in front of him, completely unaware of the hustle and bustle of the classroom around him. Nicky had once loved German, in the past, and it was sad to see how much he’d changed. Sad for him and sad for those around him. He was no longer the cheerful, bubbly young man he had once been, replaced by a sad, broken boy who had nothing. No spirit, no love. Nothing.   
Nicky vaguely heard Mrs. Weber call out instructions to the class, but she may as well have been ten thousand miles away for how much he could hear her. The only thing that snapped him out of his daze was the resounding crack of textbooks snapping shut, and chairs scraping against the linoleum floor. Glancing around, he realised his classmates were packing up, and he quickly shoved his books into his backpack.  
He was one of the last to leave, and Mrs. Weber glanced over at him. She was attempting to carry a large stack of hardback textbooks and yielded with a sigh.  
“Nicky, I don’t suppose you could help me with these books,” she started. “They’re way too heavy for me to carry on my own.” Nicky stopped walking, sneakers squeaking slightly against the floor as he turned on his heel. He raised one shoulder in a half shrug, it wasn’t as if he was rushing to spend his lunch break alone in the library.  
“Sure,” he muttered, stepping forward and taking half of the books. Mrs. Weber gave him a wide smile, peering at him over the rim of her wire frame glasses.  
“Are you okay, Nicky?” she asked, leading the way out of the classroom. “You seem very distant at the moment.”  
“I’m fine,” Nicky said, the words rolling off his tongue didn’t even feel like a lie anymore, he’d said them so often in the last few weeks they were almost starting to feel true. Mrs. Weber glanced back, raising a skeptical eyebrow, but said nothing more on the matter which Nicky was thankful of, the hallway was still pretty busy. Mrs. Weber veered off to the left into a small office and stepped aside to let Nicky past,  
“Just on the desk will be fine,” she said, gesturing to a small oak desk in the corner of the room. Nicky dropped the books and turned to face Mrs. Weber. Mrs. Weber’s stare was so intense, so concerned, that Nicky couldn’t help but let his gaze drop to the floor; he tugged on the straps of his backpack absentmindedly.  
“Nicky,” Mrs. Weber said softly, stepping forward, her hand hovered in the air as if she was going to reach out to him but thought better of it. “Can you talk to me?”  
“About what?” Nicky said, forcing himself to look her in the eyes. Her blue eyes which normally looked so bright, had turned sad and anxious, and Nicky found it hard to look at her. He didn’t want her sympathy, he didn’t know if he could take it.  
“Do you think you could tell me what’s the matter?” Mrs. Weber asked slowly, as if any sudden outburst would break him.  
“Nothing’s the matter,” Nicky mumbled, shoving his hands into the pocket of his hoodie that he’d recently taken to wearing. He preferred to wear anything that would cover him up, wouldn’t make him stand out – that he could hide in. Mrs. Weber gave a slow nod, clearly not believing a word of it.  
“I feel as though we haven’t spoken in a while,” Mrs. Weber continued, “you used to be so chatty. How was your summer vacation?” Nicky paused, there was no way she could know what he’d been through that summer, she was just asking out of kindness, out of curiosity. Still, he couldn’t hide the flash of panic from his face, despite how quickly he tried to compose himself.  
“It was okay,” Nicky said, broken voice belying his words. No one but Nicky’s family knew he had spent the summer at conversion camp, and he hadn’t thought up a reasonable excuse as to where he had been. He didn’t think he would need one. It wasn’t as though Nicky had anyone to talk to anymore – he’d distanced himself from his friends months ago. So to say Mrs. Weber had caught him by surprise was an understatement. Still, Mrs. Weber accepted it with a small nod.   
Nicky shifted his weight from one foot to another, hoping that Mrs. Weber would take the hint and step aside, letting him leave.  
“There’s something I want to talk to you about,” she said, filling Nicky with even more dread. Nicky’s shoulder slumped slightly as he gave in, preparing himself for whatever Mrs. Weber had to say. “You’ve heard of the German Exchange Program, right?” The question took Nicky completely by surprise and his eyebrows flew up.  
“Erm, I don’t know, I guess.”  
“Well, each year, one student is sent to complete their senior year in Germany,” she explained. “They stay with a host family and study over there. It’s a great way to improve your German skills.”  
“Okay,” Nicky cocked his head, not entirely sure where this conversation was going.  
“How would you feel about going to Germany?” she asked suddenly.  
“Me?” Nicky exclaimed, looking behind him as if someone else had snuck in.  
“Yes, Nicky, you,” Mrs. Weber nodded, offering him a small, sympathetic smile.  
“Go to Germany?” Nicky asked, as if he still couldn’t quite believe what she was proposing. He couldn’t. “But, why? I can’t.”  
“Nicky, you’re one of my best pupils,” Mrs. Weber said, “I’ve always seen you as having so much potential since your freshman year. I think you’d really benefit from this trip.”  
“But—” Nicky stuttered, trying to find the right words, “I-I can’t.”  
“Why not?” Mrs. Weber asked patiently.  
“M-My parents,” Nicky muttered, “they wouldn’t want me to go.”  
“Surely they could see that this is good for you,” she said, quirking a brow.  
“Maybe,” Nicky chewed on his bottom lip, returning his gaze to the floor. “But it’ll be so expensive, I don’t know...”  
“It’s pretty expensive, yes,” she nodded, “but the school covers some of the expenses. And you wouldn’t have to pay for anywhere to stay, you’d be with a host family.” Nicky stayed silent, mulling it over in his head. Maybe this is what he needed, to get away. To escape. “Nicky,” she prompted.  
“I don’t know,” he mumbled. “I mean, I guess I wouldn’t mind going.”  
“It would do the world of good,” she said. “Something’s the matter, Nicky, I’m not sure what it is, and I don’t expect you to tell me. But I think you could really benefit from getting away for a while.” Nicky nodded wordlessly as she reached into her pocket and retrieved a pamphlet. “Here. Take a look at this.” Nicky turned the pamphlet over and over in his hand – The German Exchange Program: A Once In A Lifetime Chance.   
“How long would it be for?” Nicky asked, flicking through the couple of pages.  
“Your whole senior year,” Mrs. Weber said, “obviously you’d have to come back to graduate.” Nicky thought to himself for a moment – his whole senior year. That was nine months away from his parents. Away from Columbia. Maybe it would do him good...  
“I guess I could ask them,” Nicky shrugged, offering the pamphlet back to Mrs. Weber, she shook her head.  
“You take that home, your parents will probably want to see it. You should talk to them tonight, and I can send them an email,” Mrs. Weber suggested. “But I will have to know by the end of the week.”  
“The end of the week?” Nicky exclaimed, eyebrows flying up. “But that’s so soon.”  
“I know,” Mrs. Weber nodded, “but really we’d want you to be flying out in the next couple of weeks, that way you could get the most out of it.”   
“Why me?” Nicky asked quietly, Mrs. Weber’s face softened.  
“I told you, Nicky, you’re one of my most promising students, I wanted to offer this to you first,” she said earnestly. “Really, this was all supposed to be organised last year, but I didn’t see you around too much.” Last year was a blur of therapy sessions and church retreats – he was sure that he would still be living like that had he not lied.  
“Well, thank you,” Nicky said, folding the pamphlet and slipping it into the pocket of his jeans. “I’ll talk to them tonight.”  
“Good luck, Nicky.” Mrs. Weber reached out and placed a soft, reassuring hand on Nicky’s arm, it was the most contact he’d had with someone for months, and he felt something in his stomach twist.   
As Nicky left her office, he couldn’t quite believe the opportunity he had just been given, it all seemed too good to be true. Surely his parents wouldn’t agree...


	2. Chapter Two

Nicky stared at his glass of water, the screech of a fork dragging along a plate was the only sound that filled the silence of the room. The pamphlet was still in his pocket, feeling as if it weight one hundred pounds. He knew he should tell them, suggest the idea – what was the worst that could happen? It wasn’t as if he had anything else to lose. So that’s what he did, he just did it...  
“I have something I want to talk to you about,” Nicky said slowly, glancing between his mother and father. His parents shared a sceptical look, they knew what had happened the last time Nicky had started a conversation like this.  
“What is it, Nicholas?” Maria asked, taking a small sip of water.   
“Well, I was talking to Mrs. Weber earlier, my German teacher,” he elaborated when Luther gave him a blank look, “and she suggested this exchange problem. She wants me to go on it.” He reached into his pocket and pulled the pamphlet out, placing it on the table for his parents to look at. Luther reached out and snatched the pamphlet scanning it quickly.  
“She wants you to go to Germany?” Luther asked, eyebrows raised.  
“Erm, yes,” Nicky said hesitantly, trying to read his father’s emotions.  
“Germany?” Maria exclaimed, “For how long?”  
“The rest of senior year,” Nicky explained. “Until I graduate.”  
“That’s a very long time, Nicholas,” Maria said. “Would you want to be away for that long?”  
“I’m not sure,” Nicky shrugged, swallowing the loud yes! that was threatening to leave his mouth. “I would like to go, though.” Luther turned the pamphlet over in his hands, reading the few details on the last page, he took a sharp intake of breath.  
“It’s very expensive, Nicholas.”  
“I know,” Nicky said quietly, “but she really thinks I should go. She says I’m one of her most promising pupils, and that she really thinks I’d do well if I went to Germany.”  
“Well that’s nice,” Maria said softly, catching her husband’s eye. Nicky looked between the two of them, urging them to just give him a straight answer.  
“We’ll have to talk about it,” Luther concluded.  
“But she needs to find out by the end of the week.”  
“But that’s so soon!” Maria exclaimed.  
“I know,” Nicky muttered, “she’d want me to leave in the next couple of weeks.”   
“Wouldn’t you miss your friends?” Maria asked.   
“I’d be fine.” Nicky sniffed slightly, he’d got by without his friends for the past few months – he was sure he’d be able to get by.  
“It could be a celebration,” Maria said suddenly, a grin slowly forming on her lips. “To celebrate the new you.” Nicky fought hard to fight a flinch.  
“Yes,” Nicky said, voice barely audible.  
“Well, I’m sure we could find the money,” Luther said. “If you want to go.”  
“I do,” Nicky whispered.  
“I’ll fill this out this evening, then,” Luther said, nodding to the pamphlet. “You can give it to your teacher tomorrow.”  
“Thank you,” Nicky said, forcing himself to smile.

That evening, he lay in bed, not quite sure how to feel – excited? Sad? Nervous? Maybe all of them? Nicky wasn’t sure, but he knew Mrs. Weber had been right in saying that it would do him good to get away, he couldn’t stand another minute of living like this, let alone another year. He might not necessarily be being himself in Germany, but he didn’t have to be like this. He didn’t have to be with his parents.  
Nicky jumped up from his bed, crossing the room and grabbing his notebook from his desk drawer. He had been forced to keep a journal in conversion camp, and it had sort of become a habit now. Of course, he could write whatever he wanted in it now with the knowledge that no one but himself would be reading it. He started to flick to the next fresh page, pausing when he reached his most recent piece of writing. It was the start of a letter he had written just a little over a week ago, he had never finished it.  
Mom,  
I’m sorry. I tried, I really tried. Please, find it in yourself to forgive me—  
It wasn’t the first time he had been close to reaching the end, but he hoped it would be the last. Maybe Germany would change that. Maybe he could be happy. He wanted that more than anything...


	3. Chapter Three

Nicky didn’t know too much about the Klose family; he knew they had two children – a daughter a couple years older than him, and a son who was his age. He knew they lived in Stuttgart. He knew they were going to be his host family. Mrs. Weber had been very enthusiastic about them, saying they were lovely people and had been delighted to hear that Nicky was coming to stay with them. He hoped that was the truth, he wasn’t sure if he could stand any more disappointment.  
His parents’ goodbyes had been civil to say the least, his father had wished him a good trip, and his mother had even given him a small hug, telling him to call them soon. Nicky had agreed, mostly just to keep his mother quiet. As he walked away, his head was a whirlpool of feelings – he felt sad, sad that he was leaving his parents behind, despite everything they’d put him through. Sad that he was leaving Columbia, despite how much he’d grown to hate it. But he also felt hopeful. Hopeful of what was to come.  
Nicky spent the majority of the thirteen hour flight worrying and willing himself to sleep, which was unsuccessful. He flicked through a couple books, listened to some music, but mostly, he was satisfied in looking out of the window. It hadn’t felt quite real until he looked out and all he could see was fluffy white clouds. This was real. He was leaving.

It was early evening when he arrived in Stuttgart, and he felt like a zombie as he stopped off the plane. Already, everything felt different. He felt ridiculously small as crowds of people spilled around him, as if he was nothing more than an ant watching all these different people go about their lives, all of them knowing what they were doing. He clutched his suitcase in his sweaty grip as he made his way to the arrivals lounge. People were everywhere. The crowd was like an ocean, and he was drowning in a sea of nameless faces. Despite years of German classes, the tinniness of the announcements made it almost impossible for Nicky to understand, and he suddenly felt as though he was going to vomit. He’d made a huge mistake.  
Nicky whipped around, scanning his surroundings, there wasn’t a bathroom in sight. He took a couple quick gasps of air, he could not vomit in the middle of Stuttgart Airport. His skin was cold and prickly as he broke out into a sweat, and his eyes welled with tears, it reminded him of his first day at camp, when he prayed for his parents to come and collect them.  
As the crowd slowly dispersed, Nicky finally got a clear view of the perimeter of the room. He’d only seen one picture of the Kloses, but he was pretty sure he’d recognise them even without there: Welcome Nicholas Hemmick! sign. It was somewhat of a comfort reading English, and Nicky felt himself relax a little. Apparently they spotted him the same time he spotted them, because Mrs. Klose stepped forward and waved at Nicky. Surreptitiously wiping his eyes, Nicky tightened his grip on his suitcase and made his way across the airport. When he reached them, Mrs. Klose stepped forward and pulled Nicky into a tight embrace, catching him by surprise completely. She was particularly short and the hug was nothing if not awkward.  
“Welcome, Nicholas,” she said in heavily accented English. “It is lovely to meet you.”  
“It’s lovely to meet you, too,” Nicky said, voice quiet and nervous. As she stepped back, Nicky got a good look at the rest of the family. Mr. Klose, who was holding the sign, looked just as welcoming as his wife as he offered Nicky a wide grin. He stuck out a hand to shake and Nicky felt embarrassed to accept it with his own clammy one, Mr. Klose didn’t seem to notice, though. On Mrs. Klose’s other side was a girl, who was just as short as her mother, and a boy. He was tall, a little taller than Nicky, and with his dirty blonde hair and blue eyes, he looked exactly like his father. He grinned at Nicky, and followed his father’s hand shake with one of his own.  
“This is our family, Nicholas,” Mrs. Klose said. “I’m Lena, and this is my husband, Stephen. This here is Therese,” she gestured to the petite girl, “and this is Erik. He’s the same age as you.”  
“It is a pleasure to meet you all,” Nicky said in strained German, receiving a grin from the whole family. They all had such bright smiles, it was a strange contrast from his own family.  
“Come on,” Stephen said, the sign hanging by his side, “let’s get you home. I expect you’re hungry. It was a very long flight?”  
“Thirteen hours,” Nicky confirmed. “And I’m mostly just tired.”  
“Well, we’ve set up Therese’s room for you,” Lena said, “so the bed will be ready for you as soon as you get home.”  
“Oh,” Nicky looked between Therese and her mother, chewing on his bottom lip, “I hope I’m not causing any trouble.”  
“Don’t worry about it,” Therese said, her accent was a little better than her parents’, “you’re not.”  
“Therese doesn’t actually live with us anymore,” Erik supplied, “she lives across town with her boyfriend.”  
As the family started to file out of the lounge, Nicky grabbed his suitcase and started to pull it along behind him,  
“Here, let me get that for you,” Erik said, stepping forward and retrieving the suitcase from Nicky’s grasp.  
“No, you don’t have to do—”  
“I want to,” Erik said, waving Nicky’s worries away with a flick of his hand. “So, do they always call you Nicholas? Or Nick?” Nicky wasn’t sure of the they that Erik was referring to, but he answered anyway.  
“Nicky,” Nicky said; his parents had stopped calling him Nicky a while ago, they didn’t think it was mature enough .  
“Okay, Nicky,” Erik grinned. “Welcome to Stuttgart.”


	4. Chapter Four

Nicky had fallen asleep pretty much as soon as he’d set foot in the car, and as he woke up the next morning to the cheery sound of birdsong and bright sunlight flooding through a crack in the curtains, he didn’t remember making his way up to the bedroom the night before. It took him a couple of minutes to realise where he was and what was happening, and when he did, he felt equal parts nervous and excited. The bed was exceptionally comfy, and he pulled the duvet up higher around him as he rolled over on his side. Therese’s room was painted a pale lilac, it was a pretty colour that reminded Nicky of spring and new life. It felt pretty fitting for his current situation. The walls were scattered with photographs of people Nicky could only assume were her friends, and a multitude of posters of different bands and films. His suitcase and backpack were sat in front of an empty wardrobe, and he reminded himself to thank whoever had brought them up later.  
As he pushed the duvet back, he realised he was still wearing yesterday’s clothes, his jeans and hoodie were crinkled, and he wanted nothing more than to strip off and jump into a shower. He sat sideways on the bed and slowly stood up, he still felt incredibly tired but he felt a little better after a good night’s sleep. The door creaked open slightly and Lena peered round,  
“Oh, good, you’re awake,” she smiled. “I thought I heard some movement.”  
“Good morning, Mrs. Klose,” Nicky said, offering her a small smile.  
“Lena, please.”  
“Good morning, Lena,” Nicky corrected himself, earning a brighter smile from Lena. She opened the door a little wider and leant against the doorframe,  
“I expect you’re still feeling a little groggy, why don’t you have a shower? Stephen and I have our own bathroom, so you’ll be sharing with Erik. It’s free right now, if you would like one.”  
“Okay, thank you,” Nicky said.  
“No problem,” Lena smiled. “Everything you need should be in there. I’ve left a fresh towel out for you, so you can just go when you’re ready.”  
“Thank you,” Nicky repeated, watching on as Lena left with a smile.  
The bathroom was painted a bright white and the lighting wasn’t exactly flattering. Nicky cringed when he looked at himself in the mirror. The dark rings under his eyes were heavy and even more prominent than usual, and his warm skin looked particularly pale. His hair was sticking up in every direction – he’d had it cut short a little while back, courtesy of his father, and it was so short you could barely even see the wave in it. He missed his old hair.  
A white fluffy towel had been left on the toilet seat, and as Nicky stepped out of the shower and wrapped it around himself, it felt almost as the good as the long hug Mrs. Weber had given him on his last day of school. He felt like a child again, wrapped up in one of his grandmother’s blankets – he missed those days, everything was so simple. He quickly changed into some new clothes and hesitantly made his way downstairs. Erik was sat at the kitchen table, opposite his father who was nursing a cup of coffee.  
“ _Nicky_ ,” Erik exclaimed with a grin, “ _good morning_!”  
“ _Good morning_ ,” Nicky muttered, hovering in the doorway.  
“Here,” Stephen patted the spot beside me, “take a seat.” With a small nod, Nicky crossed the room and dropped into the seat beside Stephen, feeling incredibly awkward as he stared at the table cloth.  
“Therese wanted to stay to say hello,” Erik said, “but she had to go to work. She’s a nurse, so she has to work the weekends a lot.” Nicky nodded wordlessly. As Stephen started to talk, Erik stood up and began to prepare some food.  
“Your teacher told us your family are religious,” Stephen said, grabbing Nicky’s attention. “Your father’s a minister?”  
“Erm, yes,” Nicky muttered, knotting his fingers together under the table. He tried to keep his voice even but he wasn’t sure how successful he was. Still, Stephen carried on.  
“There’s a church just a little way down the road, they do some beautiful services. We’d be more than happy to go.” It took Nicky a moment to realise what Stephen was proposing. Nicky had always preferred praying in peace than attending services, but he appreciated Stephen’s kindness.  
“It’s fine,” Nicky said, shaking his head. “You don’t need to do that, but thank you for the offer.” Stephen hesitated for a moment, glancing back at his own son,  
“Okay,” he said slowly, “but if you ever change your mind, just let us know.” Nicky nodded and fell into silence once again. He listened happily as Stephen described all the different things about Stuttgart; Nicky already knew it was amazing, despite only ever seeing the airport. After a little while, Erik placed a plate of food in front of Nicky, he looked up at Erik in surprise.  
“ _Oh, thank you_ ,” Nicky said, “ _you didn’t have to do that_.”  
“ _You’re too polite_ ,” Erik spoke slowly, making it easier for Nicky to understand him. “ _We’re your host family, let us host you_.” Erik chuckled and Nicky gave him a small smile.  
“ _Speaking of hosting_ ,” Stephen said, starting to speak German, “ _Erik said he’d show you around, whenever you’re up to it. You’ll be going to school tomorrow, so if you’re too tired today, it might have to wait until next weekend_.” It took Nicky a moment to understand Stephen fully, but when he did, he nodded.  
“ _Thank you_ ,” he said quietly.  
Lena walked in a little while after that, she flashed Nicky a grin as she slipped into the seat beside Erik,  
“Maybe you should ring your parents today, Nicky,” she suggested. “I’m sure they’re thinking about you.” Nicky worried at his bottom lip, it was the second time his family had been brought up and he was suddenly feeling nauseous; which was ridiculous, of course, because obviously they’d ask about his family.  
“Yeah, sure,” Nicky agreed half-heartedly.


	5. Chapter Five

“ _Nicky, do you like dogs_?” Erik asked. It was late morning and the two of them were sat in the living room, waiting for Lena and Stephen to have prepared lunch. Nicky averted his gaze from his clasped hands and turned to look at Erik.  
“ _Sure_ ,” Nicky shrugged, brow furrowed. In fact, he loved dogs. Ever since he was a little boy, he’d begged his parents for a dog, they’d always said no, saying that it was too much of a responsibility and Nicky wouldn’t look after it properly. Nicky was sure he would’ve. He didn’t really see his parents as the best people to dish out parental advice...  
“ _Come with me_ ,” Erik said, standing up with a grin. Slowly, Nicky rose from the sofa and followed Erik out of the room. There was a door at the end of the hallway which led to a reasonably sized garden, Nicky joined Erik outside. The air had a definite chill in it and Nicky wrapped his arms tightly around his torso.  
“You’re cold?” Erik asked, not waiting for an answer before he started to pull his fleece over his head. “Here,” he said, holding the fleece out for Nicky to take.  
“Oh no, I’m fine,” Nicky shook his head.  
“Take it,” Erik instructed, pushing the fleece into Nicky’s hands.  
“But now you’ll be cold,” Nicky said quietly.  
“I’ll deal with it,” Erik shrugged with a grin. As Nicky pulled the fleece over his head, trying not to inhale Erik’s scent – a mixture of pine and wood smoke, the outdoors – Erik stepped forward, raising his hands to his mouth as he let out a shrill whistle. “Petra! Petra!” It was only then that Nicky noticed the dog kennel in the corner of the garden, he noticed some movement and then a large golden labrador came bounding out. She sprinted across the garden, barrelling into Erik’s legs and almost knocking him over. Nicky felt a smile spread across his face as he watched Erik gushing over Petra, the way he crouched down and pulled her closer to cuddle.  
“This is Petra,” Erik said, scratching behind her ears. “She’s my girl.”  
“She’s lovely,” Nicky smiled, Erik grinned back.  
“ _Petra, go see Nicky_ ,” Erik urged. “ _Go play with Nicky_.” Petra took him at his word and turned around, charging at Nicky; he had to take a couple of steps backwards to keep his balance. Erik’s fleece was pretty big on Nicky, and he had to roll the sleeves up to pet Petra, her fur was incredibly soft and she rolled her head back to lick Nicky’s hand. “ _Oh, she likes you_!”  
“ _Really_?” Nicky asked.  
“ _Yep_ ,” Erik nodded. “ _Petra’s pretty fussy with who she does and doesn’t like, but I trust her judgement. Whoever Petra thinks is decent, is decent_.” Petra continued to lick Nicky, jumping up him. “ _Wow, she really likes you. You must be very decent_.” Nicky chuckled slightly, looking up from Petra to face Erik. Erik’s blue eyes were warm and gentle as he watched Nicky, and his grin was wide and kind. Nicky gave him a small smile before turning back to the dog, feeling a flush creeping up the back of his neck.

“Nicky, have you called your parents yet?” Lena asked, placing her cutlery down on her empty plate.  
“Erm, no, not yet,” Nicky muttered, taking a small sip of water.  
“We have a telephone over there,” Stephen said, gesturing to the corner of the room, “you’re more than welcome to use that.”  
“Thank you.”  
“I think you should give them a call after dinner,” Lena said, brow creased slightly. “I’m sure they’re worried about you.” Nicky didn’t bother correcting her, and just nodded instead.  
When they had finished dinner, Lena stood up as she stacked the plates, she turned to Nicky and nodded toward the telephone,  
“We can leave you alone, if you would like.”  
“It’s fine,” Nicky shook his head as he stood up, “I won’t be too long, anyway.” Lena nodded as she carried the plates over to the sink, Stephen stood up from his chair and went to help his wife. Petra had wandered into the kitchen and had strolled over to Erik, resting her head in his life.  
Nicky slowly walked over to the telephone, wanting nothing less than to call his parents. He didn’t have anything to say them; he was rather enjoying not having to live a lie. But Erik was watching him, and he couldn’t very well avoid it. He punched the numbers in and slowly brought the telephone to his ear, listening to the dialling tone for a good minute. Nicky was just about to give up, when he heard someone pick up on the other end. His heart sunk.  
“Hello?” Maria asked, voice distant and unfriendly.  
“Mom,” Nicky croaked, he cleared his throat. “It’s Nicholas.”  
“Nicholas,” Maria exclaimed, voice softening ever so slightly; he heard the scuffle of the phone as she held it away from her mouth. “Luther, it’s Nicholas.” Nicky shifted on his feet uncomfortably, glancing up and catching Erik’s eye and quickly turning away.  
“How are you? How was the flight?” Maria asked, dragging him back to the call.  
“Fine,” Nicky said quietly. “I’m tired but it was fine.”  
“That’s good,” Maria said, dragging out the words. There was an awkward silence. “How are the host family?”  
“Really nice,” Nicky said.  
“That’s good,” Maria mumbled, she let out a long sigh. “Anyway...”  
“Anyway,” Nicky said.  
“I guess I should let you go,” she said. “Goodbye, Nicholas. Call us again soon.” Nicky opened his mouth to say goodbye, but she’d already hung up. With a shrug, he clicked the phone back on the stand.  
“Oh, were they busy?” Lena asked, turning away from the sink to face Nicky.  
“No,” Nicky shook his head, returning to his seat at the table. He vaguely saw the look Lena and Stephen shared out of the corner of his eye, but he didn’t turn to look. He stared at the spot on the table where his plate had just been, carefully avoiding Erik’s concerned gaze.


	6. Chapter Six

Monday was hard, if Nicky hadn’t still felt extremely tired from the jet lag, the day at school finished him off. The walk to and from school was pretty short, and when Nicky and Erik got home, Lena and Stephen were still out at work. All Nicky wanted to do was retreat to bed and fall into a deep sleep, but from the glimmer in Erik’s eye, it was clear he wasn’t feeling the same way.  
“ _Nicky, are you busy_?” Erik asked, pulling his hoodie off. His white t-shirt was a little loose yet still accentuated his sculpted body perfectly, he looked a little like some of the football players from back home. Nicky tried hard not to let his gaze linger on Erik’s muscly eyes, and looked up to his face.  
“ _No_ ,” Nicky said, expression blank.  
“ _Good_ ,” Erik smiled. “I want to show you something.”   
“ _What is it_?” Nicky asked.  
“You’ll have to wait and see,” Erik said, the way he dropped in and out of German gave Nicky whiplash. Still, he found it in himself to keep up. “There’s a lot of places I want to show you, but I’m not allowed to drive you unless one of my parents or Therese is in the car with me. Not until I’m eighteen, anyway. So we’ll have to make do now.” With a small nod, Nicky followed Erik out of the hallway and back out of the front door.  
The weather was pretty warm – but nothing in the league of Columbia – and Nicky could comfortably walk along without a jacket. He and Erik walked along in silence for a while, a comfortable distance between the two of them as Erik led him down the streets. Nicky took the time to appreciate his surroundings – Stuttgart was a beautiful place, and already he loved it more than he’d ever loved Columbia.  
“Nicky, talk to me,” Erik said suddenly, snapping Nicky out of his daze.  
“Talk to you?” Nicky repeated. “About what?”  
“About you,” Erik shrugged. “About your family. _I don’t know_.” Nicky chewed on his bottom lip for a moment, he had no intention of telling Erik the truth, but he didn’t want to completely lie to him either. Erik was kind, and Nicky wanted to talk to him.  
“Well, I’m an only child,” Nicky said slowly, “I live at home with my parents. My dad, he’s a minister, so he spends a lot of time at the church. We all do, really.”  
“What about your mom?” Erik asked. Nicky swallowed painfully.  
“She doesn’t work,” he said. “She helps my dad a lot, though.”  
“How did they meet?” Erik asked, “Through the church?” No one had ever asked Nicky these questions about his family before, and he wasn’t sure why Erik was so intrigued.  
“They met whilst my dad was on a ministry trip in Mexico,” Nicky said, voice completely devoid of emotion. “They fell in love and my dad brought my mom back to America.”  
“That’s romantic,” Erik smiled, turning to face Nicky; his smile dimmed a little when he saw Nicky’s emotionless face. “What about your friends?” Erik asked, “I’m sure they’re missing you.”  
“They’ll be fine,” Nicky shrugged, hoping Erik would take the hint and drop the conversation. Luckily, he did. As they continued to walk, Nicky turned around and surveyed his surroundings – since their conversation, they’d lost all signs of civilisation. The rows of houses had been replaced by tall trees which shaded the two boys from the mid-afternoon sun. “ _Erik, where are we_?”  
“ _We’re going up there_ ,” Erik said, pointing to a large hill in the distance. Nicky’s eyebrows flew up as he turned to face Erik,  
“ _Jesus, but that’s so high_.”  
“ _It’s nothing_ ,” Erik shrugged with a chuckle. “ _If you think that’s high, you should seem of the cliffs I go rock climbing on_.”  
“ _You go rock climbing_?” Nicky asked, cocking his head.  
“ _Yep_ ,” Erik smiled. “ _And I go hiking a lot with my dad_.” That explained his muscly physique. “ _Do you do any sports_?”  
“ _Not really_ ,” Nicky shrugged, “ _I play exy a little in school_.”  
“ _That’s cool_.”  
The hill was steep, and by the time they finally reached the top, Nicky was sweating. Erik was a little red-faced, but it only made him look cuter if anything, more rugged. Erik ran a hand through his blonde hair and mussed it, making a couple loose tendrils fall across his forehead. Nicky dragged his gaze away and looked at the view instead, it was almost as beautiful as Erik.  
“Wow,” Nicky breathed, looking over the rows of fields – the perfect contrast of lush green grass and bright blue sky.  
“Cool, huh?” Erik asked, jostling his arm. “I knew you’d like it.”  
“I guess it was worth the walk,” Nicky admitted with a small smirk. Erik gave a self-satisfied grin before turning to look at the view.   
“I like coming up here to think,” Erik said softly. “It’s a good breath of fresh air, don’t you think?”  
“Yeah, it’s really nice,” Nicky said, squinting up at the bright sun. “There’s not many places like this where I live. My dad used to take me on this real nice hike when I was little. I haven’t gone in ages, though.”  
“How come?” Erik asked, turning to face him. Nicky stilled, he had no idea why he had brought that up; he didn’t want to tell Erik that his father no longer wanted to spend time with since he came out as gay, even after months of therapy and conversion camp. Instead, he shrugged the question off and tried to change the subject.  
“The sun’s really bright, huh?” Nicky said, “I’m pretty hot.”  
“Yeah, it is pretty warm,” Erik agreed, thankfully not questioning the sudden change of subject. “This will probably be the last bit of summer, though. It gets pretty cold here in winter.”  
“I love winter,” Nicky said, smiling slightly.  
“Me, too,” Erik agreed. “It’s the best season.”

They stayed up there for a little while, gazing at the stunning view and soaking up the last dregs of the afternoon sun. It was the first time in a while Nicky’s mind felt clean. The first time he hadn’t been replaying camp in his head; replaying the moment his parents said they wanted nothing more to do with him in what felt like forever. He felt like he could get used to it.   
Erik reached out and touched Nicky’s arm softly, still, it startled him and made him jump a little.  
“Sorry,” Erik said, taking a step back. “I didn’t mean to make you jump.”  
“It’s fine,” Nicky said quickly composing himself.  
“I was just going to stay we should probably head back now, my parents are probably home.”  
“Okay,” Nicky said. As he started to follow Erik down the hill, he sneaked a glance over his shoulder and stole one last look at the view.  
“ _Don’t worry, Nicky_ ,” Erik said, stopping walking to watch Nicky. “ _We’ll be back soon_.”


	7. Chapter Seven

After a few weeks of staying in Stuttgart, Nicky trusted the Kloses. Lena and Stephen were like the parents he had once dreamed of having, Therese was kind and funny, and Erik was a great friend, their relationship growing stronger everyday. Erik’s cheerfulness and exuberance counterbalanced Nicky’s quietness and solemnity, and Nicky enjoyed having someone his own age to talk to, even if the things they talked about were silly and of no great importance the majority of the time. Nicky thought he was dealing well enough with pushing all his bad thoughts to the back of his mind.  
Somehow, Nicky had been persuaded into going hiking with Erik and Stephen, and according to Erik, this would put his favourite hill to shame. Nicky wasn’t exactly sure what he’d got himself in to. As he sat in the back of Stephen’s car, he watched on as the two conversed cheerfully. He felt a pang of sadness in his heart, how he wished he could talk to his own father like that. Every now and then, either Erik or Stephen would glance back, as if inviting Nicky to join their conversation, but he kept his head down and stayed silent.   
After driving for a while, Stephen pulled into a small dirt car park, and parked between two of the only other cars that were there. Erik was zipped up in a navy blue fleece, and Nicky couldn’t help but notice how the blue of the fleece brought out his eyes. Nicky didn’t think anyone could look that good in a fleece, but somehow Erik made it work.  
“Hope you’re feeling strong,” Erik grinned as he stepped out of the car, “this is a long hike.” Nicky smiled back, but it came out and small and weak; Erik’s brow creased with concern, but Nicky turned around before he could say anything.

Nicky pretty much walked in silence throughout the walk, he listened intently as Stephen described all the different types of wildlife you could spot in the forest – once he’d even spotted a wild boar.  
At some point, Stephen held back a little, more focused on taking photographs than walking with the boys. Erik was content with walking with Nicky, and started to talk about an upcoming football game that he was excited about. Nicky had no interest in football – or soccer, as he called it – whatsoever, but he smiled and nodded just to please Erik.  
“ _Hey, watch out_ ,” Erik said, putting out a hand to stop Nicky from stumbling on a large tree root. His hand was pressed against Nicky’s chest, and Nicky wondered if Erik could feel his heart racing.  
“ _Thanks_ ,” Nicky muttered a little breathlessly, Erik looked up, flashing Nicky a grin before he pulled his hand away and continued to walk.   
The more they walked, the more tired Nicky grew, and the heavier his legs felt, but neither Erik or his father seemed to show any sign of fatigue. Nicky fought hard to keep up with them, not wanting to show any sign of enervation. He didn’t notice when Stephen stopped abruptly.   
“Nicky!” It was more of a whisper than a shout, and the hand that reached out to grab Nicky’s shoulder made him jump. The sound of someone shouting his name in such a way reminded him of his parents scolding him, the camp workers punishing him for not meeting their regulations. He flinched without realising. Stephen’s face fell as he watched Nicky squirm away from him.   
“Nicky?” Erik said, voice soft and tinged with concern. Nicky’s cheeks flushed as he quickly pulled himself together, he cleared his throat.  
“Sorry,” he muttered. He turned to face Stephen, mouth turned down into a frown as he watched Nicky. He felt embarrassed for acting that way, he knew Stephen wasn’t trying to hurt him – in the few weeks that he had known Stephen, he was pretty sure he trusted him more than he had ever trusted his father.  
“I was just going to show you a badger,” Stephen said quietly. “I think I might’ve scared it off though...” his voice died off and they stood in an awkward silence. Nicky shifted his weight from one foot to the other as he stared at the floor, not wanting to see Stephen and Erik’s anxious faces. “Maybe we should head back to the car,” Stephen declared. “We’re almost finished now, anyway.”  
Nicky walked, shoulders slumped and miserable as he followed Erik and Stephen. Once again, he had ruined everything.  
“ _Nicky_?” Erik whispered, leaning close to Nicky’s ear. “ _Are you okay_?”  
“ _Yeah, I’m okay_ ,” Nicky said, forcing a smile – it was so quick, Erik was pretty sure he had imagined it. Erik frowned a little, clearly not believing Nicky’s lies.  
“ _You can talk to us, you know_ —” Erik paused, trying to find the right words. “ _If you ever want to_.”  
“ _Yeah_ ,” Nicky said softly, turning away from Erik’s intense gaze. “ _I know_.” As they finished the walk, Nicky wondered if he ever would tell the Kloses anything near to the truth – he wasn’t sure. But he knew that they were all too nice to be lying to.

That evening, Nicky couldn’t help but keep replaying this morning’s incidence over in his head; he felt guilty, even if he couldn’t help it. At dinner, Stephen sat beside Nicky just as usual, but his back was rigid and he kept shooting Nicky anxious looks. Nicky wanted to give him an explanation, but he knew he couldn’t. Once they had finished eating, Lena started to clean up, and Stephen stood up to help her.  
“Stephen,” Nicky said quietly; Stephen stopped what he was doing, turned back to Nicky and lowered down into his seat. He gave Nicky a small smile.   
“Are you okay, Nicky?” Stephen asked softly.  
“I just wanted to say,” Nicky took a deep breath, “I’m really sorry about earlier. I didn’t mean for that happen, I know you’d never do anything. It’s just—” Stephen raised a hand, silencing Nicky.  
“Don’t,” Stephen shook his head. “You don’t have to explain yourself to me. And you don’t have to apologise.”  
“But,” Nicky paused, running a hand through his hair, “I just feel really bad.”  
“You have nothing to feel bad about,” Stephen said, offering Nicky a warm smile as he stood up slowly. “Just know that if, or when, you’re ready, we’re always here to talk.” It was the same words Erik had spoken earlier, and Nicky was starting to believe them.


	8. Chapter Eight

It was a Friday evening, and for some reason unknown to himself, Nicky had agreed to watch a football team. It was only on the TV, so it wasn’t exactly like he had to go far; plus, Erik’s winning smile was pretty hard to refuse, so Nicky was now watching football. Neither of Nicky’s parents watched any sport, so it was quite surreal to see how excitable Erik and Stephen got about it. Lena had gone to visit Therese, and Nicky was starting to think she had the right idea. Still, Nicky was in a pretty good place that evening, and although he did focus most of his attention on how adorable Petra was as she rested her head in Nicky’s lips, he did appreciate some of the handsome German football players.  
At the interval, Stephen slowly stood up, straightening his back.  
“ _Are you enjoying the game, Nicky_?” he asked. Nicky looked up from where he had been playing with Petra’s ears, Erik and Stephen were looking at him expectantly.   
“ _Oh, erm, yeah_ ,” Nicky agreed, smiling brightly. It was one of the first real smiles Erik and Stephen had seen since Nicky come to Germany, and they both smiled back. Nicky wasn’t entirely sure why he was feeling so happy, but he didn’t begrudge it. Maybe he was finally starting to feel truly comfortable around them.  
“ _Do either of you boys want a beer_?” Stephen asked, edging toward the door. Nicky’s eyebrows flew up as Erik nodded eagerly.  
“A beer?” Nicky repeated.  
“Yeah,” Stephen nodded slowly, “would you like one?”   
“You’re allowed to drink?” Nicky asked, turning to face Erik.  
“Oh,” Erik chuckled, realisation softening his confusion. “Yeah, you can legally drink beer if you’re sixteen in Germany.”  
“Wow,” Nicky chewed his bottom lip, “you have to be twenty-one in America.”  
“So, would you like one?” Stephen asked, “Or would your parents not allow it? I’m sure we can find you something else to drink if not.”  
“They won’t know,” Nicky shrugged, a small smile slowly forming on his lips. “Sure, I’ll have one.” Stephen nodded and wandered off into the kitchen. Nicky couldn’t help but feel smug as he thought of how his parents would react if they found out he was drinking alcohol right now. Nicky had only ever had wine in church before, and he had only ever drunk alcohol on one other occasion.  
“You’ve never drunk before?” Erik asked, watching Nicky from across the sofa.   
“Unless you count wine at church,” Nicky shook his head.  
“I don’t,” Erik laughed.  
“Actually, I did drink once,” Nicky said. “One Christmas, with my cousin.”  
“You have a cousin?” Erik asked.  
“Yeah, Aaron,” Nicky nodded, “he’s a couple years younger than me. We used to be real close, but, I don’t know. He’s kind of changed now.”   
“Did your parents know you were drinking?” Erik asked, quirking a brow, a small smirk tugging on his lips.  
“God, no,” Nicky laughed. “We snuck into the cellar and stole a load of their wine. They never found out.”  
“Did they not question that you were drunk?” Erik asked.  
“I’m not sure they even noticed,” Nicky shrugged. “I was only fifteen, so I guess Aaron was thirteen, maybe. I guess they just assumed we were really excited about Christmas.” Erik chuckled, and Nicky started to laugh along with him, feeling more at ease than he had done in months.  
“ _What are we laughing at_?” Stephen asked, walking back into the living room, three beers in hand. When he handed Nicky the beer, he took a long sip, letting the bitter liquid run down his throat. At first, Nicky couldn’t understand why anyone would possibly choose to drink beer, it was disgusting. But the more he sipped at it, the more the taste grew on him.  
“ _Nicky was just telling me about him and his cousin_ ,” Erik explained. Stephen’s eyebrows raised slightly as he turned to face Nicky,  
“ _Oh, what were you saying_?”   
Nicky spent the rest of the football game, telling stories of how he and Aaron used to spend their time when they were younger. Nicky smiled fondly at the memories, he missed those times, when he could still fool himself into believing that he had a happy family. That his parents loved and cared for him. Erik and Stephen were lapping it up, obviously happy that Nicky was finally starting to feel more comfortable around them; they didn’t look up at the game once.

Stephen went to bed when Lena came home, leaving Nicky and Erik alone in the living room. Nicky listened as Stephen excitedly told Lena about all the different stories Nicky had told them that evening; he smiled down at his beer bottle.  
“Did you enjoy the football game?” Erik asked. Nicky looked up from his bottle, turning to face Erik who was watching him intently. Nicky wasn’t sure whether the beer had made him more honest or what, but he’d somehow lost his filter – a glimpse of the old Nicky breaking through. The real Nicky.  
“No,” Nicky said, smirking slightly.  
“Oh.” Erik’s eyes widened and a small smile played on his perfect lips.  
“Sorry, that was really rude,” Nicky said, wiping the smirk from his lips. “I enjoyed the company, it’s just, I’m not that into soccer. Football,” he corrected.  
“It’s fine,” Erik said, evidently amused. “You’re not being rude. You’re just being honest.”  
“Well, sometimes it’s better if I just keep my mouth closed,” Nicky mumbled, placing his empty beer bottle on the coffee table.  
“I don’t know about that,” Erik shrugged. “I like this Nicky. The happy outspoken one,” he elaborated when Nicky cocked his head.  
“Outspoken?” Nicky repeated, cringing his head.  
“Outspoken in a good way,” Erik reassured him, reaching out and placing a warm hand on Nicky’s shoulder. “I really like it. He should come out more often.”  
“He’ll try,” Nicky promised, head tilted down as he looked up at Erik through his dark lashes.  
“Good,” Erik grinned. “I guess we should head to back.”  
“I guess,” Nicky agreed, standing up and following Erik out of the room; trying hard not to focus on how the spot that Erik’s had just been was still tingling.

**Author's Note:**

> Title based on Teenage Dream by Katy Perry
> 
> I know that this isn't completely accurate, but I hope you enjoy it anyway!  
> *The italic sentences are German*


End file.
